How well do you listen?
Do you listen to learn or simply respond?
Would you rather hear yourself speak versus listening to others?
Take a few minutes and think about the conversations you had over the past week or so. Think about the person you were being during those conversations. Were you an active listener, paying attention to what the other person was saying, or were you simply preparing for your next response?
When I came across this quote by the Dalai Lama, I immediately began looking back at my past interactions with people. I was surprised to realize how many times I actually did not focus on listening to the person in front of me but rather I was preparing for my counter response.
Think about those times when you are with a group, at a work meeting, friendly meetup, or a family function. How often are you actually listening to the people around you as opposed to thinking about what you will say next?
I think we miss out of learning from others and what they have to say because we are constantly focusing on what we will say next, me included.
We want to make sure we contribute to the conversation so we avoid leaving space in order to hear and understand the information coming in.
It is through a person’s choice of words that you can really learn about them and the information they are sharing. However, if you solely focus on what you will say in response you diminish your capability of learning.
As the quote suggests, you are not learning anything new when you talk. It is information you already know.
As I became more involved in mindset and habit change, and helping people shift from a negative to a positive state, I had to improve my listening skills. It is something I am still working on and will continue to work on. It definitely takes practice… a lot of practice. When you are not used to listening, and I mean truly listen, it can be a bit difficult.
One problem I had in the past was remembering people’s names. I often forgot a person’s name less than a minute they said it.
Has that happened to you?
I mean, yeah, I heard the name but I was not really listening.
I was so concerned about my initial interaction response. I was looking for that witty phrase that will get the conversation off to a good start. I did not take the time to listen to who was actually introducing themselves to me.
Can you think of a familiar situation?
However, now that I am aware of it, I can make a conscious shift to a more active listening approach and quiet my mind in its preparation of my next response.
The next time you have a conversation, remember you already know whatever it is you are going to say, be quiet, allow some space in the conversation, and listen.
You may be surprised at what you learn.
Now it’s your turn.
How does this quote inspire you?
Tell me about an experience where you were so focused on what you were going to say that you missed out on all of the good stuff being spoken. How are you at listening today versus the past? Do you see any room for improvement?
Contact me or share your thoughts below in the Comments section.
Let’s get the discussion going.
Remember, you are not alone on this journey. Together we can become stronger individuals.
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