Are you afraid of confrontation?

Do you adapt to others to avoid friction?

Have you stayed away from difficult conversations because you fear people’s reactions?

Take some time to think about how you interact with people and if you are able to stand up for yourself. On the other hand, do you typically bite your tongue when you are unhappy because you don’t want to cause any waves with the other person?

This quote by Dale Partridge expresses the positive aspect of confrontation rather than the negative ones many people tend to focus on. Yes, confrontation is hard. I can’t recall a time where confronting someone else felt warm and fuzzy. However, it can access doorways to communication that may never open otherwise.

How often do we avoid confrontation, especially when it comes to a family member?

We don’t want to hurt their feelings but by shying away from having those conversations we hurt ourselves in the process.

Think about it. Confronting the issues at hand can be important for growth to occur, not only within each person, but also within the relationship.

As the quote mentions, the key ingredients when approaching a confrontational situation are awareness and with the intent to reconcile. Storming in to a conversation with anger and judgement won’t resolve anything. Doing so will end up looking more like those cars you see in a demolition derby constantly smashing in to one another.

You want to be able to express how you are feeling, as well as also see the situation from the other person’s point of view. Remember, their defensive shields will most likely kick in immediately. Being able to listen to their perspective, without judgement, can help lower their guard.

As I take the time to reflect back, I’ve had plenty of instances where I either, chose to avoid conversations to prevent drama or friction or approached others as if it was time to go to war. In both scenarios, neither was productive.  Nothing was resolved and tensions typically rose.

However, when we can approach confrontation with a different perspective, it will be easier to manage. Coming from a place of awareness, recognizing your own feelings, as well as acknowledging and understanding those of the other person, you can work towards resolution and growth as opposed to a constant crashing of opinions and beliefs which will continue to fuel judgement and anger.

Now it’s your turn.

How does this quote inspire you?

Tell me about how you typically handle confrontation. Do you avoid it because of past incidents that ended up in that dysfunctional cycle of judgement and anger? Are you still avoiding confrontation now where it actually needs to take place? If so, what is one thing you can do to handle that difficult situation with curiosity as opposed to judgement?

Contact me or share your thoughts below in the Comments section.

Let’s get the discussion going.

Remember, you are not alone on this journey. Together we can become stronger individuals.

Educate. Engage. Evolve.