Do you allow assumptions to enter your relationships?

If so, are they providing a positive or negative effect?

What emotions are your assumptions stirring within you?

As I was looking for the right quote to write about for my next post, I was in a rather conflicted state of emotion about someone close to me. Then, out of nowhere, this quote by Henry Winkler popped up and it hit home. It definitely applied to the mood I was in at that moment. That said, here we are.

I was letting a handful of assumptions dictate my emotions towards a relationship with a close friend of mine. Now I said a handful but it was more like a truckload. Yeah, that better describes it; and those assumptions were not making me feel very good inside.

Think of a past or current relationship where you let your assumptions drive you to feeling in a negative state. You begin to assume all sorts of nonsense about what the other person might be thinking or feeling; however, it is fictitious. Your imagination runs wild and makes it all up; and it does a great job too.

That is exactly what I was experiencing, yet, I could not figure out why. I had to bust out the mental shovel, break the surface, and start digging a bit deeper. You cannot discover buried treasure simply by scratching the surface, right?

Once I began my solo expedition, I discovered the root cause was that I was feeling a lack of communication between us. It was causing my mind to play fill in the blanks.

Have you ever played that game inside your mind? It typically leads to undesirable answers. Would you agree?

I was making all these assumptions based on what I thought was happening because we had not had the opportunity to have a good conversation in a number of days.

You might say, “Well if you are feeling a certain way then there is probably a good reason for it.” Yes, I would agree with that. Our intuition can be a very powerful guide.

However, assumptions are simply that… assumptions. I had to shift my focus and not allow my assumptions to dictate how I was feeling.

The truth is we often let our assumptions steer our emotions in ways that are not always beneficial and have no real validity. It is those assumptions in a relationship can eat away at it causing us to come from a place of fear rather than love.

However, opening the lines of communication between two people is what will reveal the truth.

Are you allowing assumptions to play fill in the blanks in your relationships?  If so, how is it making you feel? What can you do to open the lines of communication and help uncover the true answers to those blanks you are trying to fill?

Now it’s your turn.

How does this quote inspire you?

Tell me about an experience where you let your assumptions, either good or bad, interfere in a relationship. Were you able to clear them out with honest, open communication?

Contact me or share your thoughts below in the Comments section.

Let’s get the discussion going.

Remember, you are not alone on this journey. Together we can become stronger individuals.

Educate. Engage. Evolve.